The Physicist, a lovestruck knight
comports himself with honour
at the tournament Experiment
in hope that Lady Nature,
lovely, chaste, mysterious maiden,
charmed by his heroic deeds,
will twirl with delight and let her gown
slip open briefly to reveal
a glimpse of breast or flash of thigh.
The Chemist is a rogue who cares
only for schemes
to get into the lady’s pants.
The Engineer’s already down
on one knee proposing marriage
and the raising of bright
who will make their parents rich.
The Biologist catalogues these
examples of courtship behaviour
while the Psychologist smiles knowingly
and the Philosopher is, of course,
above all this nonsense.